today I am one step close to winning that Oscar
I responded to an open call for actors and was invited to come down for shooting today
i was nervous as i had no idea who I was meeting up with really only that they were shooting out in the middle of nowhere ( east greenbush). I texted my Pastor ( and friend) the address of where I was going and the phone number of who I was with just to feel safer.
Well now I’m officially starring in a horror flick with potentially more filming opportunities on the way. And hopefully some new creative friends.
Every Sunday church becomes more and more amazing. I feel that not only do I grow close to God but I also become closer with the other members and just generally more relaxed and accepting of my place in the world. My church is really small and at best there usually no more than 10 people. I think Pastor Christina writes some of her sermons for me. Not just for me but with me in mind. I find her very encouraging and inspiring. During communion one of the other attendees sings ‘Jesus Loves Me’, it makes me cry cause I think of Grace. Grace and I had a little bit of a falling out back in August. In my darkest of times ( around Jan 2015) Grace encouraged me to sing this song as simple as it is to feel better. While I didn’t do that, I have amped up my playlist with a lot of christian music and I do find that having a hymn in your heart does wonders for the soul. Still ‘Jesus loves me’ touches a nerve. For the first time I was able to sing a long for a couple of verses before getting too chocked up. During the offering it was revealed that there were a lot of blessings. God is doing great things in everyone’s lives, starting with Christina who is with child. Pastor Hannah was grateful for being able to play her violin this past week a blessing because she has been very, very ill as of late. I’m going to be spending A LOT of time at church between now and the end of the year. We are starting a choir, a meal program, and a weekly bible study ( aside from my one on one study). I may also sign up to be a mentor. I’m very very excited and I love every moment I spend at church. ❤
I’ve made some gains in my pageant sponsorship stuff. My website is looking better and better. I updated my ‘gofundme’ site too. My favorite part is that I took out the part where I had said training at the gym restored my faith in humanity. The truth is my faith in humanity has not been restored, it’s my faith in God through conflict and adversity that has been renewed. I actually have never had less faith in people EVER. And I’ve finally realized that being a Christian doesn’t mean you’re not a skeptic. After all Jesus was persecuted and he says that we will be persecuted as well. Generally speaking darkness hates the light. But anyways I digress…
Even if no one else believes in me, thanks to my mama Cinderella can still go to the ball. Barley but whatever. I feel like God is calling me to do this ( and if you read up on your bible history then you know that dipping out on God’s calling is not something you want to do) and I also feel like there is just too much at stake to walk away. My chances are winning are slim but you gotta play to win. And it’s a risk I’m willing to take: I could potentially go to school for free and maybe even pay off my student loan debt. Not to mention what the exposure could do for my modeling/acting career (or lack thereof). My friend April thinks it would foolish to spend my inheritance on this but I know my mom would say go for it. So that’s what I’m doing. At the end of the day ALL I need is God, that’s what the past 2 years have taught me.
Oh and I bought a car. 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀
A shiny black 07 chevy cobalt
I named my car Waldo after the first stuffed animal given to me. He was a big black dog whom I married at one point. After the divorce Waldo went on to marry Hannah Fluffy Muffin Mitchell, a big white dog given to me by this really nice man named Kirby. Sometime around age 5/6 my church had a silent auction. There had been this huge white dog at the auction that I desperately wanted. My mom bid on him but could not out bid the competitor. I sobbed in my moms arms, hysterical. The next Sunday Kirby brought in Hannah. My mom and I were big on stuffed animals. Little known fact, I was ( and still am I guess) the Queen of Stuffed Animals. My kingdom was quite expansive as I had many. Truth is I never needed a sister because I had the most amazing mother in the world.
In other news, it looks the metroland no longer exists. Their offices were seized by the IRS. The was a couple of weeks ago and since then nothing’s been printed. This past Saturday Caoimhghín received his black belt in brazilian jiu jitsu. And Sensi’s wife mentioned something about him getting married. So I guess not only will I never find out who that metroland person was, but after all that stuff he’s moving on with somebody else. Great thanks for playing with my heart and head. No big deal really. In the end I say good riddance. I literally have no more tears left for this person. I’m dry.
I’ll be spending the holidays with my Uncle in DC and he’ll be coming down once in Dec. So that plus all my church time, Christmas, the pageant…there’s a lot to look forward to. But it all kind of wraps up by February. All I know is that I’m committed to losing this weight, I’m almost there and then I’m done.
Done with my Dojo
Done with Albany
and done with the North East.
Sunshine baby, California all the way.