Praise God! Today was such a fantastic day! It started with me having the day OFF! Yay 😀 I know I only started working my paying gigs this week ( and I’ve yet to actually get paid) but I was praying for the day off because I wanted to be apart of the Sanctuary for the last day of Uptown Summer!

This morning I woke up late. Uptown starts at 9 and my alarm goes off at 7. I set it for 7:30am this morning because I wasn’t planning on walking there ( since Mommy bought me a bus pass 🙂 ) I didn’t get up until about 10 am this morning. I was a little bummed but I checked my email and lo and behold an email from a marketing company looking for individuals for a 4 day gig later this month to promote a new retail business that’s moving into the area- which just so happens to be the same retail company I had my first day at yesterday. If I get the position I could be making $18-$20 an hour! So I applied to that. Then I showered and missed the bus.

I was again, kind of bummed because I didn’t want to miss all the action ( and all the coffee and bagels) down at The Sanctuary. I decided to study my bible and I read Luke 3:1-20 and Mathew 3:13-4:17 & 5:1-6:4. I’ve been following this daily planner called ‘The Essential One Hundred Bible Reading Plan’ which basically skims through the bible. I don’t skims is quite the right word, it gives you a chronological display of events that outlines the lines the story from start to finish. It’s more than a skimming, but it’s less than a straight read through ( which can be difficult because there are A LOT of books and some chapters are quite wordy). Pastor Christina gave it to me as it is the plan they follow on her Sunday mornings. Although we are still studying together, I haven’t been in a couple of weeks ( and I won’t be there this week). Even still, it has been AMAZING. I have a lot of bible knowledge from growing up in the church so its all very familiar but from life experience and just general maturity I’m really getting it know. It’s great. So I read through the old testament according to the outline and I just started the New Testament. Anyways, the chapter I read in Matthew was basically Jesus explaining how we must still follow the words of the Old Testament even in his presence. He goes over murder, adultery, debt, giving, enemies, oaths…etc. What stuck to me most was where Jesus says to settle disputes and debts as quickly as possible and to not curse since it doesn’t glorify God. Those are 3 things I struggle with as I generally avoid conflict including debtors and I’ve had quite the sailors mouth.

I had just enough time to catch the bus afterwords but I guess I missed the one I was waiting for anyways. Another one came that dropped me off right at my destination so it all worked out. I got there around 1130 am. There was plenty of bagels, no cream cheese and I had two cups of coffee.

I didn’t have a whole lot to do today as most of the projects were in wrap up mode but Branda and Kathy were happy to see me! I spent most of the day working on my own blog which you may have noticed looks a bit different. I started the daunting task of organizing and I made 4 categories that all my posts, past present and future, will fall into. The categories are as follows: Journal, Old Testament, New Testament, and Meraki. I may change the names of old and new because I feel like it walks the line of blasphemy although that is not what my intention is. The category of Old Testament is everything before I really gave my life to Christ and decided to follow him, New Testament is after having given my life to Christ, and Meraki is artwork which can also fall into OT or NT and everything is under the parent category of journal. I’ll probably change OT to ‘Before Christ’ and NT to ‘After Christ’.

Next I have to go through all my posts and edit them finally as there are a lot of spelling and grammar mistakes. That is going to be obnoxious. It’s the kind of task that I might of enjoyed doing after smoking, or at least I would of idealized doing the two going hand in hand but the truth is that smoking while fun at times mostly was a waste of time and resources. I don’t think it in and of itself is wrong, but since it’s illegal in my state I can no longer consent to doing it. Which is something that’s been on my heart for awhile, but I finally made the decision to give it up. And I’m proud of myself for coming to this conclusion. Since I haven’t been smoking I’ve been much more productive and actually happier too. I missed it at first, when I simply wasn’t doing it because I couldn’t afford it, but I as I started growing my faith, spending time in church, studying my bible, spending time with other Christians, and listening to sermons online I’ve found myself more and more filled with the holy spirit which is a different type of high and it’s so much better. It’s a feeling of joy and oneness. A feeling that nothing else compares to. I have felt it but it hasn’t overwhelmed me yet. I look forward to it overwhelming me 🙂

Everyone at the Sanctuary is so encouraging. And I feel really gratified spending time there. Whatever is going on, it’s always something that is supporting the community. And I really admire and respect the leader, Branda Miller, whom is a professor at RPI. She studied digital film, has traveled the world, and even worked in Hollywood! She has such a big heart and she really authentically enjoys helping people. It’s so amazing. I look forward to getting to know her better and maybe she’ll mentor me. Sunday we are going to Grafton ( another thing I’ve been praying for) and we’ll talk about upcoming plans. In the fall I’ll be an official intern which means I’ll get to help run the radio station (!!!!!!!!!!!!) and I’m hoping to start up a work out group since I’ll be doing one anyways through my dojo. I figured I can learn those moves and teach them to my new friends and we can do them together. This well supplement all the nutrition classes the sanctuary already has and I noticed they don’t have any work out programs. Another super awesome thing is that everyone tells me I’m doing a great job. I think back to when I worked at the jewelry store and I remembered my old manager saying that she wasn’t going to tell us that every day and I just kind of accepted that, like ‘ok maybe it is too much to say that everyday’. But now I realize that it’s not at all, it’s quite the opposite. Showing appreciation is a staple and it’s easy and it’s always great to hear- even if you are confident in what you do.

For lunch there was pizza and then for desert an ice cream social where we played the students projects and then talked about what we enjoyed about the session. I spent the rest of the day working on my blog and then editing my own ‘Self Portrait’ that I recorded in the studio and will someday air on the radio. In it I talk about my adventure from Phoenix to Schenectady, meeting my friend Esha, my family who makes me who I am, my weight loss, and my desire to run for Miss NY ( and also how my confidence is holding me back). It’s like almost 20 mins long. Branda says it’s beautiful but no one will listen to it because everyone has such a short attention span these days. So I’m trying to size it down. Branda, Lydia, and myself stayed until 10pm! We would of grabbed dinner but no one had money ( we literally had $13 between us- I had a silver $).

Branda drove me home and gave me a bunch of fresh veggies from the Collar City garden. So now I have an abundance of food ( another blessing I have been praying for). I get to get creative know as I think of ways to cook all this new food as it is all vegetables ( some bagels). Maybe I will take pictures of my creations and share the recipes I come up with, or MAYBE I will video and do a tutorial! We will see. The latter involves heavy duty cleaning of the kitchen 😦

Tomorrow brings bible study with Pastor Christina and we will be diving into Chapter 2 in Song of Songs. And Sunday I will go to Terra Nova’s morning service again and then to Grafton Lake. Maybe I’ll get super lucky and I’ll get the gang to stop by the Peace Pagoda. There is an amazing energy there. The last time I went I was in pretty bad spiritual shape. I just laid in the temple, tears pouring from eyes as people walked around me and prayed. I was pretty broken then. I don’t think I’ve ever been happier than I am right now and I know that that feeling is just going to escalate. I have so much hope.

Looking forward to seeing my Mommy again. I’ll be praying to go home for Christmas.


I wrote the following this past Monday after the start of my recent internship for The sanctuary but I posted it to the wrong blog: 2015-07-31 11-36-36

I have been kind of cryptic lately as to all the upcoming changes, let’s just say by September 2nd, my whole is going to be completely different. It’s so excited and a little nerve racking but I have all my faith in God. There are a few things in the works right now, I don’t want to jinx myself by sharing right now but I will say that expect to see more and more published works from me! And not just writings either, recordings too.

I super miss working at my dojjj. I’m praying that God is with me as I try to work out my schedule ( because I am hoping to take Krav and Muay Thai again, plus work full time, and go to school, and volunteer at the Sanctuary as much as possible). I really want to do school this fall and I’m thinking I’m going back to Human Services if they’ll have me. I did really well while I was in that degree program and I actually really liked it but was initial put off by the idea of social work. However, I realize now that there are so so sooo many directions to go in with an associates in Human Services including an option in pastoral work should I decide to become ordained someday. And i’m thinking about it. But I’m not sure if I really want to be a pastor as much as I really want to be a missionary and travel and spread the Good News.

I finally find my mission, my direction, my purpose although I don’t quite feel ‘on fire’ yet I keep praying and studying and I know it’ll happen soon.

Today I am back at the Sanctuary taking pictures and blogging. And Saturday I will be checking out Terra Nova Church in downtown Troy. I’ve been there before but I didn’t really love it ( it felt kind of cold). But I’ve been listening a lot to their sermons online and one of their pastors is very gifted. So I’m am giving it another shot! Looking forward to it.

I haven’t given up on the Miss NY thing so hopefully God will bless me with some sponsorship.

A new way to worship

Greetings from the Sanctuary for Independent Media!

Today the name of the game is “Art and Nutrition”

My tasks included picking up trash outside the building, which was hot and sweaty. I will admit it wasn’t my choice of things to do, but I couldn’t help but think to myself that this was not only for the good of the sanctuary and their upcoming video shoot but also for Christ and the good of the earth. Picking up trash can be some what of a thankless activity but it something that we should be doing everyday anyways. We have such a beautiful planet and we’ve destroyed it with our garbage and waste. 

Someone said something today that I found very moving and it was that nutrition is more than what we eat it is also community and what we do for our soul: even with the best ingredients if we neglect our innerself we will still have no peace and harmony.

That is so true and most certainly something that I have been experiencing in my own life lately. Just the past week I got the opportunity to hang out with someone that I had previously reservations with getting to know only to come to find out how awesome of a person they really were and that my reservations were really a reflection of stuff I am going through personally. && Last night I hung out with two of my favorite ladies and watch a great movie on love, relationships and God. It is important in the technology age to keep up our personal connections with our friends and loved ones. No matter how good the HD and 3D and whatever get, it will never replace being with someone one on one.

The Sanctuary will be making filming && editing educational videos which you will be able to find up on their website.

Check them out and all their events at

more to come 🙂